Why Behaving Like A ‘Grey Man’ will Save Your Life
In a survival situation, whether it’s a global, large-scale event that lasts years or a small, short-term situation, you don’t want to bring attention to yourself. Doing so can put a target on your back in a variety of different ways.
In survival prepping, there’s a concept known as “Grey Man”. This is someone who blends in easily with their surroundings to the point that nobody notices or can remember details about them.
Please note – If you’re a woman all of what we describe below will apply to you too, but we keep to the phrase of ‘Grey Man’ as this is widely known in survivalist circles.
The military and intelligence forces often use this strategy to help them in undercover or dangerous situations, so it’s something that survival-preppers have adopted as a way to stay safe.
It’s not about hiding. In fact, it’s the complete opposite – it means you’re capable of going anywhere undetected. Hiding can make people suspicious just as much as loud, braggarts can when it comes to holing up with supplies other people want.
How a Grey Man Approach Helps You Avoid Threats
Adopting a Grey Man approach will reduce the risks that you’re under in a survival situation. By being unrecognizable, you will keep yourself and your family safer. Sometimes, this means altering the perception people have of you so that you’re not standing out because you have prepared.
For example, if a government agency arrives in your community handing out supplies that everyone is desperate for and you don’t bother going, it’s a clear sign to everyone that you’re already stocked up, putting a target on your home.
Likewise, if it’s a long-term event and everyone’s slimming down due to the rationing of food and your family stays plump and fed, they’ll know you’ve got supplies on hand – and they’ll want them.
If you’re walking around carrying a heavy backpack stuffed with goods, you’re making people want to take it from you. In desperate survival events, you have to look the same as everyone else so that you don’t stand out at all.
Your mindset will even play a role in where or not people pick you out as someone who has prepped for the event. If everyone else is fatigued and stressed, and you’re upbeat and happy, they’re going to know something is off.
With the grey man concept, you are considering human nature and their behavior is critical to whether or not you go undetected as someone who has planned well and stocked up on supplies for your family.
In addition to dressing and looking the part, you need to become an expert in human behavior. Know when to keep quiet and when to add to conversations. Read the room and noticed subtle social cues to help you blend in easily.
How to Dress the Part of a Grey Man
Embracing the Grey Man concept means you start by dressing and appearing the same as everyone else. Even your grooming will matter, because people in a stressful survival situation usually notice those who stand out as different.
Your clothing is where you want to start. Now is not the time to be wearing designer brands and emblems that make people remember you. You want plain clothes – no bold colors or logos.
Wear neutral tones like beige, grey, black and dark blue. You want to fit into your surroundings, so that may vary depending on where you’re located. A farm town might have different attire than an urban setting.
Your clothes can be functional, but you don’t want to go out on a supply gathering outing and end up walking around with stuffed pockets. If there’s a long-term crisis event, people may have more of an unkempt appearance – their clothes may start to show wear and tear, so yours will need to as well.
That extends to your personal grooming. As a man for example you don’t want to stand out as clean shaven, with perfectly styled hair and smell like cologne or perfume if everyone else is looking dingy.
Although you don’t have to look like a walking disaster, either but just don’t stand out as something remarkably messy that makes people wonder how you have shaving and grooming supplies when everyone else doesn’t. As a woman you want to avoid all makeup even eye-liner and mascara – in fact you want to hide your femininity as much as possible. Wide, loose fitting clothes and sturdy shoes are better and make you blend into any crowd. It is also a lot easier to walk or run fast if you must when you have comfortable hiking shoes or high-ankle sneakers instead of fancy high-heels.
When you’re planning your wardrobe and going out, don’t forget to leave any accessories at home that might signal that you’re a survival-prepper or that you have something they want.
A tactical watch, paracord bracelet and survival clothing might indicate that you’d make a good target. For everyday outings we suggest you take a nondescript bag or backpack, not a tactical one made for survival purposes.
How to Behave as a Grey Man
Your behaviors are just as important as what you wear and how you look. Anyone who stands out and acts different is going to draw attention to themselves. If you’re hurrying through a crowd acting panicked, you’re going to make people look.
If you’re walking purposeful and smooth, moving with the crowd, no one will notice that you’re there. You want to maintain a neutral expression, too. Don’t look afraid or emotional.
You don’t want to avoid all eye contact, but don’t stare, either. It needs to be a glance that’s not memorable. If you have nervous tics or habits that people will pay attention to, train yourself to be still and not draw attention to yourself.
Keep in mind that sometimes, even the best stealth work can fail. You might be in a situation where you’re surrounded by people who are intent on targeting everyone, regardless of whether or not they blend in.
In that case, you want to escape the location without people noticing as much as possible. Gradually remove yourself from the area, rather than making a run for it where everyone notices.
You can also use your surroundings, whether it’s a building or some obstruction like a wall, perhaps a column or even an overturned table if there is panic and commotion to stay hidden from the threatening situation and then quietly sneak your way out of the area.
You want to practice the Grey Man approach regularly. Try it in different settings, such as a hectic urban environment like New York City – or a suburban mall. Take public transportation and walk through the streets to see if you can meld into the background with ease.
Practice how you carry yourself and how you interact with others. Everything from the pace of your step to the eye contact you make will matter. There have been many civil unrest events in recent years, and this is the type of situations where a Grey Man approach can save your life by keeping you out of any confrontations.
The Grey Man approach isn’t just smart for survival situations. It’s a wise approach for everyday life. There are criminals targeting those who have more than they do on a daily basis, so expensive accessories, a lack of attention and an unhealthy need for all eyes on you can have a dire effect if you’re not careful.
The lack of attention to your surroundings is particularly dangerous and the very common habit of runners to use headphones and ear plugs makes them the perfect target and victim for any mugger and rapist. With music or your favourite podcast blasting in your ears, you won’t notice anyone approaching you from behind until it is too late and they got you pinned down defenseless on the ground.
Being a Grey Man is a highly adaptable strategy where you’ll need to avoid judgmental eyes of strangers as well as your neighbors and the community in general. It provides cover for your preparations and keeps your family and your supplies safe.
This is something you want to not only learn for yourself, but teach your loved ones as well. It won’t help for you to be the only one practicing the Grey Man strategy if your spouse and children all stand out like a sore thumb.
Now that you know the benefits of becoming a Grey Man let’s look at the next article in our Survival-Prepping 101 Series – Part 20: How to Develop a Tracking and Hunting Plan.
If you missed the previous report you can study it here: Part 18: How to Learn Local Navigation without GPS